JOANNA CAREW

December 2023: Devastated as my marriage finally ended.

Mel and I had had a rocky year, we started a trial separation in October 2023, and just as I thought we were ready to reconcile I discovered something so major there was no going back. In one swoop I lost my lover, best friend, home and career.*

*At that stage I couldn’t comprehend continuing in business with Mel, trust had been destroyed, and not holding a GDC registration I couldn’t legally run the business without him.

I grounded and in that darkest moment my sister scooped me up driving me 300 miles to her house in Norfolk. I bunkered down, cried for two weeks, and barely ate losing 8kg. I looked and felt terrible.

I was heartbroken and, not for the first time in my life, felt like a complete f*ck up.

June 2024: New life, new home, happy Jojo!

I have worked hard to heal myself over these past months and to build a new life. Psychotherapy, brutal honesty, family, and friends have been critical to this process. Both Mel and I contributed to the failure of our marriage, and it is better that we divorce rather than cause one another further pain.

I can’t speak for Mel, but from my side I forgave him, and we have restructured our relationship to become respectful business partners. We both love our baby, Carew Dental, and decided to work together to make it thrive. We’ve flirted with becoming friends, I’d say we’re not quite there yet but as the emotions calm between us I can see it’s plausible.

Because we are so amicable, we are having a straightforward divorce, where neither of us will take anything from the other: we’re leaving the relationship as we started it.

So, I decided to invest my savings into something I have always longed for, my own home!!!!! Initially I was looking in the Tyne Valley where Mel and I lived and my friends and networks are. Then my sister asked if I’d ever consider relocating to Norfolk, it had never occurred to me, but the seed was sown.

… I work remotely, so it doesn’t really matter where I work from … It would be great to be nearer my beloved sis and brother-in law … I’m super close with my brother and his wife and they’re in Cambridge … Alfie (my son) is going off to travel the world so he won’t be up North for much longer …

I convinced myself it was doable and yesterday I picked up the keys to a gorgeous place in the countryside about 20 minutes from Norwich! It is old, quirky and full of character. I love, love, love it!!!

This genuinely feels like a new chapter. I have headspace to reflect, grow in self-awareness and to challenge myself. I feel very happy and grateful much of the time.

It’s amazing how a troubled relationship wears you down so you don’t have any energy. Now I am up between 5-6am every day, bouncing around with bags of energy, out and about with my pooches, or focussing on work challenges.

I feel love and kindness towards the world again. It’s a very special place to be ❤️